I’m sure there are many, many things that you should not say to a pregnant woman. But in this post, I’m going to talk about one that is getting very, very annoying and frustrating to me. I have heard this comment several times from several different people. Why don’t people think before they speak? Is this society really that ignorant? What ever happened to “putting yourself in someone elses’ shoes”?
I am getting really, really tired of people telling me “you look big!”
Do you have any idea how that can make an already hormonal pregnant woman feel?
Luckily, I know my body, I know I’m NOT big and I know what I was before I got pregnant. Before I got pregnant, I was very active for two and a half years. I worked out almost every day. I ran. I ran a lot. I love running. I love working out. I love lifting weights. But if you venture back to this post here, you can see why I have NOT worked out since becoming pregnant. I’m simply not allowed to. This pregnant has been high risk since the beginning. And the last thing I want to do is put my baby girl in jeopardy because I’m in dire need to be “fit” (which I’m not, believe me-I LOVE my pregnant body).
Needless to say, this is something you do not say to a 5’2, 106lb petite girl. I’ve gotta say that the first 10 times I was told it, I just let it go. But after the 40th+ times I’ve heard this, I just want to let you all know how rude it is. How much it bothers me. How much it pisses me off. Because I love my body. I love the changes. I love being pregnant. And for people to say this crap, sorta ruins it for me. Makes me feel like they are un-supportive, negative and bashing me.
I’m not saying I’m this glowing, beautiful pregnant woman. I am by no means. Heck, another thing that really pisses me off is people pointing out my face. Yes, I KNOW I HAVE ACNE. I look at it every day. It’s my face. I see it 100 times a day people. I don’t need you to try to sell me products when I’m walking through the mall or ask me “was your face always like this?” or “what is wrong with your face?” Yes. I have had people ask me this question. Several times. In fact, I was in the beginning of a pedicure when this Korean lady asked me this question. I put it to a cultural thing. She didn’t know any better. As I sat there wanting to kick her in the face and start crying, I just simply said “I’m pregnant. It’s the hormones.” But why should I have to explain? Why would anyone in their right mind ask a question like that to someone? Especially woman to woman. Come on! I mean, you see that I’m pregnant. Don’t you stop to think that maybe it’s the hormones? Yeah, I had my occasional breakouts before pregnancy. But I’ve never, ever had acne this awful. And It’s not something I want to discuss either. It’s my face. And it sucks. But I know it’s temporary. And I know that this beautiful baby girl I have is worth all of it. She can take ALL my beauty. She deserves it.
This is me last summer right before I got pregnant. I was fit. I was active.
And just for the record, I’m not going to have a huge baby. There isn’t a monster in there. I don’t have diabetes and I’m not growing a macrosomia baby.
Oh yeah, I also have celiac disease people. Do you understand or know what that can do to a person? Regardless if your gluten free or not you still have flare ups. And I’ll be the first to tell you that after I eat, my stomach looks huge. After I wake up, I feel small again. Being celiac is always a struggle and always something I’ll have to deal with. But it’s not doing me any favors in this pregnancy that’s for sure. I struggled with constipation the first 15 weeks before I finally figured out how to get it under control.
Bottom line. If you don’t have anything nice to say, just don’t say anything at all.
A Pair of Socks 
Omg Stacy! Your so good at blogging! I totally agree with you on everything! How rude of women to point out acne or point Nywhere near your fecundity . You know I personally have my birthmark to deal with and people seldom ask me a thing when I’m without makeup! I can’t believe these people! How rude. It’s like give the pregnant lady a damn break. The emotion your speaking of brings me right back to when I was pregnant. I loved it too! I had no idea about the celiac disease that’s awful to deal with. Plus your high risk ! Jeez that’s a lot! Well hang in there girl.. The next time someone says anything don’t take any crap! You were so right when you said your baby deserves the beauty. Such a sweet quote. You are beautiful! So screw those shallow idiotic women! 💓💓. Once again.. Nice blog!!
Awww Jenny! Thanks girlie. xoxox
Yes, people are definitely rude and need to know that *for the record*, we as pregnant woman are not preoccupied by society’s aesthetic as we are trying to grow healthy babies. I’m not dieting and preventing my weight gain. Besides every pound that my skinny petite body puts on is to help support the new life inside so I’m hoping I gain steady weight. I’ve had people say, “you are gonna be HUGE by 8 months”, and “you need to pace yourself” in regards to the amount of weight I’ve gained. Sorry to burst bubbles but that is the beauty of it all. I don’t have to do a thing and my body knows what to do to prepare for my baby. I’m not going to be “huge” by 8 months, I’m going to be carrying a nearly fully grown baby inside of me. I’ll be pregnant. The connotation that “huge” is used to shame me into thinking I’ll be fat. I will not be fat, I’ll be beautifully pregnant. Rock on momma!
Exactly. Amen. You said it perfectly.
You are beautiful! Forgot those who say crap, I just don’t think they understand.
As long as we know what we gotta do, all that matters are the two little girls we are bringing into this world…and they will be healthy! 🙂 xoxo
I’m 4’11” and was 100 prepregnancy. I encountered a few comments that definitely got to me, some ppl could have held their tung. I gained around 50lbs
I can only imagine the crap people were saying.
You are beautiful!
I could care less if I gained the weight. If baby needed it so be it, right? haha I’ll lose it again. It’s not like I’m going to allow myself to be an out of control fatty. 😉
let me start off by saying ur a beautiful person, wife and soon to be mommy. I think Bobby would agree 🙂 !!! trust me hear thus crap too I know how u feel bc I have been super active working out kidding weights running and doing CrossFit but u know that 🙂 not to mention how I have bad stretch marks I’m not perfect but again I’m not lucky like most women that have all 1-5 kids and still have the perfect body with no marks what so ever but I know they. we’re warrior marks of the my precious babies I have had and im still baking ;). ppl r just rude.
I love u girl xoxo
Awww Ruby! I love you! Thanks girl. xoxo
I just can’t understand why so many women go crazy about having stretch marks. I could care less, honestly. It is what it is. My husband loves me for me, it doesn’t bother me and I’m rarely in a bathing suit for the world to see and so what if they do? haha. xoxo
I totally agree with you! I have one woman at work who continues to say inappropriate things to me regarding my growing belly & gaining weight. So rude. I am going tolet her know next time that the comments are rude & hurtful. Just not sure yet how to choose my words. How can people be so stupid?
It’s hard to let people know your true feeling in the heat of the moment. I like to wait it out until I calm down a little bit. Then I approach them and let them know exactly how it hurt.