I Never Want To Forget…

Your amazing determination and independence…

Your beautiful blond hair and eyes that change from blue to hazel to a beautiful mix of green… How you loved gymnastics when we tested it out with Shantel and Ayla. Eventually we will go once a week but we first need to get over our colds and start feeling better for longer than a week… Your steady gaze when Daniel Tiger comes on. He is your favorite right now. You love his show and I won’t lie, I do too. It’s so cute and catchy. We dance to the music and sing the songs and you sway…adorable. Your interest in music and musical instruments. I hope we can get you to play the piano one day… That cheesy smile… The fun you have with this little beauty, Ayla. You two are adorable together and it melts my heart to see you enjoy yourself as much as you do when she is around. What a beautiful friendship you two have. I hope it lasts a lifetime no matter where we end up… The day you finally ate something substantial without any reaction. Fish sticks! And you loved them! That beautiful smile full of perfect teeth… Your very first playdate with Ayla, Shantel, Becky and Lincoln. You discovered new toys that you loved and we all made Christmas crafts. We spent the day playing, eating and crafting. It was the best… Your second Thanksgiving spent with a wonderful family while Mommy worked.

Shantel was so kind to bake me chocolate chip cookies and a roast in the crock pot so I had a meal to come home to that night. We just love her to death…

These two… Your not one, but two bouts of RSV and the scary ER visit we had… Your advent calendar. I taught you that you get a Mickey Mouse sticker for each day and you can put it on the wall next to your Christmas tree and we will date it and keep it to look back on. You had to remind me sometimes that it was “time for sticker”…  The look on your face when Daddy comes home and your entire mood changes. It’s like everything is right in the world again… You in a diaper a shirt and some socks… Your second time meeting Santa. You absolutely hated it. You tried so hard to smile through your fear… The Riverview house lights with Shantel, Bob and Ayla… The look of wonder when it comes to everything Christmas…  How you love to help me cook in the kitchen. We bought you a guidecraft and you love it. I can actually cook now without you begging for me to stop, give you some or pay some attention to you… How you walk into your house, shut the door and call “kitttttttttttttttty”…How you open your windows and say “hiiiiiiiiiii mama!”…This face. The face of you having fun with Daddy. It’s always different with him. You love your Daddy so much… How you were determined to figure out how to get on that rocking chair… Our many trips to Disney. Your face when the fireworks went off and how you would say “wow!”… How you love to wear your shoes and how you try so hard to put them on yourself… Our nightly walks… How you went pee pee on the potty for the first time December 9^th. I got you out of your crib and put you on the potty first thing in the morning. You were a little thrown off guard from the noise it made and got up afterwards to look at it as Daddy and I started to congratulate you. You were startled and ran out of the bathroom. I put a diaper on you and you finished. It was a start. It’s a long journey until it’s complete. We are so proud.

That you finally stopped using the swing at 15 months old, after we moved to Florida. I kept it next to my bed for months for those “just in case” moments but you proved you no longer needed it. One more thing to pack away.

How you stopped letting us rock you to sleep in your recliner. This was the one thing mommy selfishly hung onto for as long as I possibly could because I knew you were ready to give it up a while before I actually let you. But when you were ready, you were ready. I enjoyed that time. I enjoyed the peacefulness of watching you drift to sleep in my arms and then holding you close before I put you in your crib. It was my calming moment of the night where I would piece things together from the day. I cried that night when your legs were too big to comfortably lay across my lap and you were struggling to get comfortable. Turning and moving and kicking and pushing. I just knew. I put you in your crib and gave you the bottle and the rest was history. Of course I tried to rock you following night and the night after that. But you wanted nothing to do with it. You’re getting so big, Josie.

How sweet you are, Josie. You sleep so well and nap so well. And I thank God for that. We’ve had our moments but overall, you are a great sleeper. All we have to do it lay you in your crib and you do the rest. Just as long as you have your “blankies”.

When you walk up to me and hug my leg and say “awe”. I know that means “I love you”. And I soak it up because it’s rare, my child, that you ever cuddle or love on me or daddy.

How you’re so very independent but love having a playdate and friend to play with. You do so well playing with Ayla.

How you scared the life out of mommy. You had 2 more allergic reactions since the 9-month scare. It seems you’ve got some cross sensitivity to chicken. Poor girl. We took you to another allergist where they want to do blood work. But I am not taking you alone and putting you through that, so it will have to wait until Daddy gets home to help.

How you try to sing the alphabet. Or when you know exactly which apps to press on your iPad. I love it when you walk up to the refrigerator where the alphabet magnets are and you say “A, E, I, O, U”.

How you know your animals, your fruits and your vegetables. Even though you don’t eat most of them…

That when you get frustrated or upset you like to poke at our eyes. I’m not sure where that came from but that is what you do. It’s painful and strange. But I always try my best to re-direct you and let you know that is not what we do.

How you count all the ducks as you line them up after the bath…

That you love to watch The Grinch with me…

How you climb on the couch and our bed now with such determination and feel so proud of yourself for getting up there like a “big girl”…

When you say “uh oh”. It is so adorably cute!

When you say “hiiiiiii mama”.

Or when you’re doing something that you’re proud of and you say it…

When you sit on your rocking chair and say “weeeeeeeee” and rock back and forth…

Or when you frantically search for all your “b’s” (blankets) and you grab each and every single one in a huge pile and carry them around the house with you.

How you try to change the channel on the TV when you get a hold of the remote…

When you reach up and grab my hand when we start walking down the sidewalk…

How you just know when Daddy is gone for a while and you wake up all through the night until he comes back home again…

Your face on (our) Christmas Morning. All the toys. All the different stuff. The look of awe in your face and smile was so priceless. And so sweet…

Our Dear Josie, you are growing and changing as fast as the days go by. I feel like I don’t enjoy you enough in these times. Because I never know when your “last time” is for each of the moments I’m still holding on to. No matter how big you get or how grown you are, you’ll always be our baby. I love you sweet girl. To the Moon and Back.