Let it Go!

I started this blog all because of a little precious miracle…Josie.

I was pregnant and decided to start “talking about it” and “recording every thing” for her.

Then life happened.

LIFE.

And all the in betweens…

Then I got pregnant again…(after life happened in between all that mess).

Then I lost my family…people died, I was dead to people, people became dead to me…

LIFE.

Then things got dirty and ugly and I turned ugly and negative and turned into bitter Barbie…ha!

Bitter. Bitter for too damn long. Oh goodness, did they steal my happiness for much too long.

Oh thank God for a sweet and loving, understanding husband whom “told me how it REALLY is” with my family and made me WAKE UP…

My deteriorating health made me wake up!

Ultimately, this blog turned into what I did NOT want it to…

The UGLY truth about my family…

The hidden secrets…EXPOSED!

So…

Here I am…

I’m changing all that.

Today is the first day of my last 90 days…

Today is the last day of my so called “therapy blog”…

And things have changed…

My goodness…I can close my eyes and smile so incredibly big with happy tears and remember that “feeling” I felt when Bobby and I became “one” (again)…and that’s when it started. And I look at us now and we’ve been through hell and back. We’ve been through so damn much. And we are so so so so strong as a couple. When he holds my hand and still tells me how incredible I am, how much he loves me more then life and how I am the best mother he could imagine to our daughters, it makes all this pain and trauma I have been through just blow off my shoulders and God takes it all. He has His hand open and says “give it to me, Stacy. Trust me. Believe in me. I am here for you. Let me take your pain.” And He is and He has.

During all this trauma…this pain…this fight…I discovered Him.

I have never felt closer to God then I do now. No matter what has happened. Good, bad, losing family, friends, etc.

Today…I KNOW God loves me. He is watching over us. He is teaching me strength I never thought I’d experience nor ever even knew exisited. He is amazing. He is HUGE! He is the brightest answer in the darkest moment of my life.

And I am so forever grateful he brought me to Him. He showed me the way and is still showing me. He showed me that if I’m weak, how to GROW! And oh! How I’ve grown…

He has showed me how to move. FEEL! LOVE! And most importantly…LET GO!

LET GO!

LET GO!

LET.you.go! Yes, you!

Stop, for goodness sake, STOP the words. The hurtful, hateful, painful, words. Just STOP!

STOP!

I have always been open to change. Open to being FREE from pain.

Recently, when Bobby took my hand and opened up to me about how important I am, how loved I am, how much I DO matter in this world…in HIS world…it shook MY world.

My goodness, I love that man. And God certainly blessed me with him and his love.

So…

This is it ya’ll…

No more. No more. No more!

I will not talk about “them”.

Just like he doesn’t want me to in our day-to-day lives…

I won’t here, either.

I am better than this.

I have been transformed!

So, let’s start over…

Welcome to my blog. My name is Stacy and I have two beautiful daughters and one amazing, one-of-a-kind, phenomenal husband-Robert. I’m not perfect, oh! No where near but I can love you. I can love you hard. And my life? It’s not perfect. But here it is…read on…

This.is.our.little.loving.growing.family…

WELCOME!